How Joshua Harris Made Me Unproductive For A Day (Part 1)

20 Sep

There are a lot of things that are going through my mind lately. Just this Monday, I was at work but didn’t really do any work, because my mind was (and still is, till now) occupied that kept me off my concentration to get things done at the office. Although I did few minor stuff done, but most of the time I just spent it contemplating about life and myself and my surroundings. I was not glued to my chair all day, I kept standing up, walking, going to the washroom, pantry, locker room and even outside the office. And aside that I was quite annoyed over some people in my workplace, I was occupied thinking about things that I might say, really matters.

I’d like to blame Joshua Harris for this. LOL. No, I’m kidding. But well, yeah after listening to one of his sermons I’ve downloaded online a week ago, Some nagging questions started to stepped in. The sermon’s title is “Don’t waste your life”.

Being a reader of Joshua Harris’ books for almost a decade now, not to mention my irregular visit to his blog and their church websites, I feel like I know him personally now. I don’t know. I am now accustomed to his style, may it be writing or preaching.. yet he still and always amazes me of his profound ideas and the anointing God has given him. Although I find almost all of his sermons very enriching and helpful to my life specifically the spiritual aspect of my life, this particular “Don’t Waste Your Life” sermon has made an impact on me, especially, when he asked the question, “Did you live for what matters?” Although there are more stuff to learn and contemplate from the sermon, but that particular phrase/question moved me. It has been a few days now that I use the “Do you live for what matters?” phrase as my status message on my yahoo messenger, msn, skype, and gmail, and yeah even on my account on facebook. I think I just wanted to remind myself of the question all time by writing them everywhere. Also get the others on my friend’s list thinking too if they are “living for what matters.” I’m sure somehow it made it them think. One of my friends even responded to it saying, “what a question!” Another one said, “that made me think!” I knew what they meant by that.

I’ve already had tons of nagging questions in my head, but this one tops all of them. Do I live for what matters? I started thinking of what really matters not only in my life but in this world. Because if I am to define or enumerate what matters in my life, I could list a lot of selfish things that I think really matters. I could think about myself, my career, family, relationship, (well these two really matters), then promotion, savings, traveling local and overseas, car, house/condo, etc.. all of which are considered too selfish (except for the two I’d say).

Then I started to look at it in a Christian perspective… what God has given me, the “talents” that I am supposed to use, to cultivate or increase or make use of, not for my glory but for His. The resources God has blessed me with, how can I use it to show the world of God’s greatness? Then I started thinking if I am being a blessing to my family and to all the people around me or am I being a burden?

I could reveal too much about myself if I will write all the thoughts I have on this blog. But I guess I am just too overwhelmed of the ideas and questions that I can’t really put them all into writing.

You see, being a Christian, not to mention a member of a Minister’s family, is something I should say not easy. Don’t get me wrong, being a Christian is wonderful. I feel privileged to get to know Jesus, to be able to worship him, to be His child and to be saved. Being a Christian is a privilege. That’s how I look at it. You have this unlimited access to God, to talk Him, knowing He really listens and cares. These are just some of the wonderful things about being a Christian, but it wasn’t easy as well. Although now I meet a lot of Christians everywhere I go, still sometimes, I can’t help but feel different from the rest when you are one. I am not saying it’s bad but they just don’t or can’t understand why I act or do things this or that way.

And having a parent as Church Pastor (the head pastor in our area, you see I am from one of the big Christian churches in my country) is another thing. When I was a growing up, I used to think if being a pastor’s kid is a curse or a blessing. Although I must admit that we not only experience the “privilege” of knowing Christ but also the “fringe benefits” of being part of this family. Yes you get special treatments and all.. ( which sometimes I honestly do not enjoy) but hey, that is part of it. I could mention a lot of things that can be classified as good and not so good about being a pastor’s child. But as I grew older, God has started to make me realize that this is one of what he has given me, one the resources that he blessed me with that I should make use of. Instead of running away from it, rebelling against my parent’s position at the church, I should take it as an advantage to give back the glory to Him. It may be hard to be a pastor’s child but this is God what has given me and I must embraced it and help my parents fulfill their “duties” at the church and at home.

Another is, I am also blessed to be offered a position in the company I’m working for. I know this is just one of His works in my life. That is why, everyday, I acknowledge my nothingness before him, asking him continuously for wisdom and knowledge and the leadership skills and all the things I need to give justice to the role that he entrusted me with. Sometimes, I get weary and feel like backing out especially when I get overwhelmed with all the negativity I am facing… that I am thinking of quitting my job. Yet, God will remind me that I am here in this position not for what is written on my CV but because God has put me here. And who am I not to accept? And like being a pastor’s child, I also get to enjoy the fringe benefits of being a supervisor in my workplace, but I know on top of those privileges, God put me in this post for a reason and that is what matters. I am not here for nothing. He has put me here to bring back the glory back to Him.

to be continued…

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One Response to “How Joshua Harris Made Me Unproductive For A Day (Part 1)”

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  1. Books and Magazines Blog » Archive » How Joshua Harris made me unproductive for a day (Part 1) - September 20, 2008

    […] Original post by take me i am yours […]

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