It’s Time To Write (Updates)

26 Apr

It’s been a while and I miss doing this.

I know I was busy with a lot of things, but that shouldn’t be an excuse to completely ignore my first love – to write.  It’s my outlet afterall.  I think this is the reason why I feel down and depress these days because I don’t get to sit down, think and pour out my thoughts. I feel like it’s suppressed. With all the events and happenings – the church activities and all, at the same time the company’s, I feel so not in touch with myself. I don’t get the time to reflect anymore. So this is the right time…

So what’s been going on? Let me list it randomly:

-The most recent – the Philippine holidays. Yes! There was a 2-day holiday last week due to Easter and I can’t help but mention, that after maybe 7 years, I only get to enjoy my country’s own holidays now. That’s what I get for working for BPOs for quite a long time. Although too bad, most holidays this year falls on a Sunday and P-noy made the business owners happy this year when he lifted the Presidential decree or whatever you call it about moving holidays to either Monday or Friday. No more long weekend for us. 😦

– The company I am working for…  so far so good. I think I’m enjoying right now and liking what I’m doing. We had a company outing a few weeks ago, where we had some Pinoy games. It was fun especially when you used to play them when you were young, it’s so nostalgic!

– M. We talked a few weeks ago, didn’t turn out quite well but still I was happy I got to talk to him. I called. He did mention about missing me and wanting to talk to me everyday. But it still ended not quite well with him telling me, that although he wants to talk to me everyday, he is controlling that urge so that we won’t run again on circles again. *Sighs* I miss him really. Very and it’s so hard to breathe now. 😦

– My youngest sister getting married. I think aside from the unfavorable situation I have with my relationship with M, this is one of the things that occupies me too much these days. I have to admit, I do not like the guy she is marrying. And I have my reasons.  But then again, it’s not my decision and my choice. I have to respect my sister’s. She’s old enough now. But the sad thing is, the influence that guy has on her wasn’t good… I felt like I’ve lost a sister ever since they got into a relationship.And now that they are planning to get married this year, I fear that that I will completely lose her and she will be so far away from us. I know I also have done wrong things, especially for not accepting that guy. But he still hasn’t done anything to prove his worth. He still hasn’t done any effort to reconcile. And he can’t even do it for my sister’s sake?  I don’t know what to think… I know I have my faults too but it’s not mine entirely. I know it will never be the same again in our family after their marriage. It will be just mom, dad and me in the house. Although I still have my parents and I know they love me,  I feel so alone sometimes. And I feel like I’m an orphan, especially that I don’t have M beside me. I think if he was just with me, I won’t feel like this. *Sighs*

– One of my best friends is on vacation for 2 weeks with his family. I am happy for him because he gets to enjoy with his family and rest. But I feel sad because there’s no one to talk to. No M, no sister, no best friend. What else could go wrong? *Sighs* Plus, before he left, we talked and it didn’t turn out quite good. But I hope to talk to him when he gets back. Hope and pray they will get back safe and sound.

– Migration. I don’t remember the last time I thought about moving to another country but I remember it started way way back and I applied if I will qualify to move to Canada. I was young that time and I barely have experience in life and I don’t have savings. Now that I’m older (and wiser), the Migration plan resurrected. I don’t know where yet but I’m eyeing SG or some European country, maybe Canada again, I don’t know yet but I’d like to prepare for that soon.

I guess that’s it for now. It really helps that I put these into writing because it’s been plaguing my mind. I know most of the updates are sad. But what can I do?

Oh yeah, this one last is a good one. I’m reading again… and I’m trying to finish the book Dug Down Deep. So far so good. I’m reading every morning, on the way to work. I wont let the bad things happening and my busyness interfere with my reading. It’s good news isn’t?

Okay, till next post!

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2 Responses to “It’s Time To Write (Updates)”

  1. john tugano May 3, 2011 at 1:43 pm #

    WELL I GUESS there’s no excuse now for you not to write again..your timetable is now clear and you’ve got lots of time to spend writing..

    nice post..

    • y May 3, 2011 at 8:58 pm #

      Hey John, thanks for taking time to read my dramatic post..haha… and liking it too!

      Yup, I have no excuse not to write again. I will. Thanks for the encouragement. 🙂

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